Random Writing on Tumblr Reblogs

So I have this Tumblr with Katie and Randomly I'll decide to post random things to that particular blog. It gets most of the fun/girl-go-crazy/nightlife related blog posts while my actual tumblr gets the crap that doesnt fit anywhere. Way to go Me.

Anyways, this photo showed up in my dashboard, and I, for some reason, wrote the following:


via brokenmachine:ceasingtolovereality: papertissue

God, isnt that true.

An Aside: It's not often that I actually have a reaction to one of these photos that I reblog. I mean, occasionally i think, "wow, that's amazing, that's absolutely beautiful" or "man, something about this photo just irks me in the right way", but its not often that I come across a photo that I look at, and swell up.

Over.

Background: We're moving. Pretty much everyone knows we're moving, but what are we leaving behind to do so? It's not something you want to think about. I mean you always want to look into the future, we look forward to what's going to come.

I saw this photo, and instead of thinking: "Oh, how pretty" my thought process went something like this*: "a thumbtack, I mean how simple...Who doesn't have that. On a map, makes sense, I mean, where else would a thumbtack be aside from a map, or a corkboard. This is not a corkboard. This is a map, and thumbtacks on a map usually show places you have been. And look at all those thumbtacks in the distance, each one, a reminder, that something you loved is still living in that place. I began to wonder how that person must feel, shoved, nay, buried and pinched under the tip of some office miscellanea, torn to shreds between an aluminum point and a plaster wall. How sad, how utterly heartbreaking to think that moving, and starting over means that you have to leave something behind, because, I mean, come on, how are you supposed to "start over" if you don't actually "start". I mean, then; at that point, you're just left with "over", and "over" is not a 'start', its not a 'beginning', its not a 'go'; "Over" is a 'done', an 'end'."**

That got me thinking. When I go, when we finally get there, are literally a thousand different potential outcomes, each with their own heartaches and growing pains, each with something left behind.

So how do you know? how do you if you're absolutely supposed to let go? How do you know what to hold onto? How do you know you're not making the wrong choice?

*A thought process? an entire thought process in a paragraph. It seems very presumptuous to assume that you could actually accurately describe a thought process in one paragraph, in one book, in a tome, in any form of writing. Thoughts are fleeting and the processes that bring them to us are troublesome and difficult to understand.
**Although I referred to this as a 'process' I think, in reality, its more of a breakdown. My breakdown, maybe. emotionally, immediately? Unlikely. It takes too long for the feeling to directly manifest themselves as words on this machine. By then, my fingers would've had the time to learn to censor what you ultimately see. But what I meant, was a breakdown of a photograph. Which is way way simpler.

-M